Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you
by Phoenix on cloud nine
Summary: Oneshot songfic. Vince is left crushed after Howard leaves suddenly. Can anything get them back together? Lol, I've never done angst before, so sorry if it sucks.


**I have severe writers block for 'Too small for his boots', and this popped into my head when I was listening to Abba lol (I know, how cool am I?)  
Disclaimer: I don't own the Boosh or Abba. But I do have the Boosh book and some Abba songs on the computer. That count? No? Fair enough...**

_I was sick and tired of everything  
When I called you last night from Glasgow  
All I do is eat and sleep and sing  
Wishing every show was the last show_

Vince gazed at himself in the mirror. That mirror. The last thing he ever got from Howard before he had gone. How he hated how much that mirror brought out his face. Every spot, every misplaced hair on his head seemed to be enhanced a thousand times more with this mirror.

--

"_Hey Howard!" His partner looked up from the book he had been reading._

"_Yeah?" Vince plonked himself down on Howard lap and gave him a playful kiss, before grinning and saying, _

"_Guess who I just met in the pub?" Howard shrugged, and stroked Vince's back lovingly as the younger man chattered away,_

"_And they said I could be frontman! It would mean me bein' out quite a lot, but I didn't think it would matter, 'cause you and Lestor can hang out a lot more!". Howard shook himself and tried to take in what Vince was saying._

"_So you're going off with some band? Can I just remind you what the date is?" Vince hated seeing the look on Howard's face as he shrugged._

"_It's only our first anniversary! Remember how I got us tickets for us to go to see 'Moulin Rouge?' Because you said it was your favourite film? And now you're standing me up to play at a gig with your mates?" Howard sat up in anger, making Vince leap up and stare in shock as Howard paced up and down angrily._

_"It's bad enough you go out every single night with your awful 'friends'" Vince blushed in anger as Howard continued, "I thought you might have changed after this year we had together, but you haven't have you? Still the same, desperate, attention seeking Vince, who'll drop even his boyfriend at the drop of a hat to get famous"_

_"That's not true and you know it!" Vince yelled, getting angrier as Howard had a stupid smug smirk on his face, "I've done so much for you, and you don't even fucking appreciate it!" Howard was shocked at how out of control Vince was getting, and even more so when he saw the tears of anger glistening in his eyes, "Well maybe you don't notice what I do, but plenty of people do! We're gonna be huge! Maybe I don't need you anymore!"_

_Both men gasped at what Vince had just said, the younger man with tears now trickling down his cheeks, and as Vince was trying to get the right words, Howard just gave him an icy glare that he shrunk under and said,_

_"Fine, if you want me out of your life, I'll get out of it now"._

_And he was gone._

_--_

Vince shook himself from the memories that had flooded through his brain. Whenever he thought of that day, new tears built up in his eyes. He could barely come out of his bedroom that he used to share with Howard, and it was only with deep persuasion from Naboo that he carried on with the gig he had gotten that fateful night. Vince's band were now huge, and quite a few people were hearing about them. Still, before every gig, he would sit in front of his mirror that Howard had bought, and think. Nothing too deep and meaningful, just Howard. His heart ached in pain whenever he thought of him, and sometimes he would just sit and sob, staring into space on the double bed they had shared.

He was getting thinner, only eating when absolutely necessary, and just sat in the bedroom and sang along to whatever CD was on at the time. His eyes had lost that bright spark they used to have, and looked grey and lifeless. In one of his deeper, darker moments, he would think about how life without Howard was. That was the problem. There was none. Without Howard, he was nothing. An empty shell of a person, once called sexy by all and beautiful by one person. Now it was just 'depressed'. He honestly thought about just slitting his wrists to get away from it all. Just as he was picking up a knife he had had a thought. Howard wouldn't care if he was gone. He wouldn't hear about it. No-one would tell him. That thought went through him sharper than a hundred knives. Again, he put it down an wept.

Unbeknownst to him, Naboo had been stood outside the door and shook his head. After weeks and weeks of this, he had had enough. He couldn't sit back and watch Vince torture himself because one person wouldn't see reason and come back. While Vince was thinking bleakly of how no-one would tell Howard that he was dead, Naboo had been holding a peice of paper with an address and phone number on it. He shook his head and reached for the phone.

--

"Vince?" Naboo walked into the room, not hearing or ignoring Vince's mumbled, 'go away', "Vince," He stopped as he saw the young man sat in front of his mirror, just staring.

"Vince, the gig's in an hour, you need to get ready". Vince stared up at Naboo with blank eyes. He could tell Naboo things, because he knew that the shaman would never repeat them, unless it was juicy gossip,

"What's the point?" He whispered, his voice cracking. Naboo sat down beside him and carefully put his hand on Vince's arm,

"Because Howard will be there to watch" Vince's head jerked up and he already had tears in his eyes,

"How do you know?" He croaked. Tears fell freely down his face, and Naboo wiped them off gently,

"I called him" Vince looked amazed and angry, so Naboo hurried on, "He gave me his address and number, and told me only to call in an emergency". Vince still looked gobsmacked, but Naboo shook him a bit.

"Vince, you have to pull yourself together. Do you want Howard to see you like this?" Vince jumped up as if a lightning bolt had him, and started searching through various pots and bags around the mirror that he had grown to hate so much during the last couple of months.

_So imagine I was glad to hear you're coming  
Suddenly I feel alright  
And it's gonna be so different  
When I'm on the stage tonight_

He teased his hair into place and looked at himself, almost shyly, to find someone looking almost calm and collected looked right back. Howard was coming to watch him. At once, he started bombarding himself with questions. Would Howard approach him? When he was on stage, would he be right at the front looking at him with pride and love? Or hate and disgust?

"Vince, we've gotta go if we want to get there before, erm... all the fans show up". Vince looked up at him and gave him the first smile had shown in ages. From then Naboo knew it would be alright. He slipped put as Vince started humming to himself, wiggling slightly on his chair, the first Vince-like thing he had done in ages.

"Ok Naboo". He gave his appearance another critical glance and nodded at Naboo, knowing it would be different when he was on the stage. Howard would be there.

--

They arrived at the club very early, Naboo making the excuse that he and Bollo needed to sort the list out (Bollo had been elected bouncer at all the band's gigs). Vince merely sat at the bar, not drinking, just staring at the doors of the club. One by one, the other members of the group arrived, and after a quick, whispered discussion with Naboo, they all trouped past Vince, giving him small smiles and mumbling something about needing to check the equipment. Vince nodded and kept his staring at the doors. His heart racing every time someone walked past.

How would Howard react though? Would he come in, see Vince, check he hadn't gone crazy and leave? Politely stay for some drinks then leave? Just shout at Vince for being such a bastard and then leave? As these thoughts whirled around Vince's head, the front doors opened.

Howard walked in, looking quite shy and embarrased, then stopping dead as he saw Vince. Vince stood up slowly, and locked eyes with the older man. Suddenly, all the worries that had been in both men's heads vanished, and they ran towards each other.

_So I'll be there when you arrive  
The sight of you will prove to me I'm still alive  
And when you take me in your arms  
And hold me tight  
I know it's gonna mean so much tonight_

"I missed you so much" Howard mumbled, very aware of his shoulder getting damp, as Vince said, between sobs,

"I'm sorry Howard! I shouldn't have lost my temper!" He looked right into Howard's eyes and said, "I love you"

"I love you too". Vince smiled at him, and they both reached up to close the gap between them. Naboo and Bollo both smiled at this and went to get the other band members, to get ready.

--

As Vince was up on stage that night, he was aware of one person in particular, right at the front, gazing up at him and smiling. The one person not singing along or dancing. The person who was simply looking up, with so much adoration he felt like he would burst. He honestly couldn't see how he could have left him for so long. He looked like an angel on stage, with the lights shining overhead, and the overall gorgeousness of him made Howard feel like his heart had literally burts, full of love. Vince had to fight so hard to keep singing, and not just jump down and kiss the person he was sure he would spend the rest of his life with.

_Tonight the  
Super Trouper beams are gonna blind me  
But I won't feel blue  
Like I always do  
'Cause somewhere in the crowd there's you_

**Tadaa!! I thought the ending was kinda lame, but there you go. I've not really done much angst before, so sorry if it wasn't very good I thought it was too run through myself, cause I'm tired, busy, in the mood for writing NOW. Anyway, reviews are adored ;)**


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